will be away...

hmmm, i wont be able to write until November. October will be a busy month. i need to settle few things... work is the main thing for now. i need to terminate my broadband that i have now. will go for the prepaid one, much more affordable. doesnt matter if its a little bit slow, i dont go to youtube much, so i dont see why i need too advance internet connection... the basic broadband would be good. but for now, i need to let go of this modem since my sister need to borrow it for her study. well, she needs it more than i do...

so, i will be back early November... hopefully. hell yeah, i'll be back in November... LOL!! i'll be back, bye for now...

August

self defense...

i cant sleep, almost 2am now... its weekend anyway, im not suppose to be sleeping early. after dinner, i just lock myself in my room, my friend Paul from Japan did called earlier. he's in KL and wanted to see me and chat over dinner, but i dont have to mood to drive and spend the evening out... lazy bone, yea, kinda lazy today... Paul told me that his friend Zach from Holand is in KL too. ok, maybe i'll see both of them tomorrow, they're going back to Japan on Monday morning.

anyway, i have a friend from Philippines who is currently residing in KL and run a self defense class. Aikido. i always love Aikido. not that i dont know how to defense myself, i did attend a thai kickboxing class for 3 months while doing my diploma in the North. but, it was just a basic class, learn how to hit, punch, kick and that's all... i quit during my final semester to concentrate on my study. i dont want to come back and repeat the paper. its all maths and i just hate it...

he did invited me to see the training and see whether i want to join, but the thing is, i just dont have enough time to do it... kinda occupied with works, things at home, spending time with my nieces and nephews stuff like that... Aikido sounds good, i really have to think about it... maybe i'll join the class next year. hopefully... yeah, hopefully...

August

what were you thinking?

okay, im gonna sound angry today... i was in a deep sleep since it is almost 3 in the morning when my phone rang... i quickly pick it up but soon after i click on the answering button, the caller just hang up... here's the thing, i have problem to sleep. not like some people, i need to be on bed at least an hour before my bed time to allow me to roll on my bed, let my mind wander before i finally get to sleep... i cant just put my head on the pillow and sleep after 5minutes...

so, this caller, whoever she/he is, called again and the same thing happen, hang up when i pick it up... last thing you want to do is to disturb me when im sleeping, i extremely HATE it... owh, i forgot to put this one on my hate list before... anyway, 4 calls and the caller never talk... finally, a text message came in sounds like this "hi Ann, sorry for the missed calls. its me, Andre. what are you doing right now?" i dont recognize the number, never see it before, never have a friend name Andre and im not Ann for heaven sake...

God knows how angry i am... i wish i can grab this guy and pull him inside a pond full with piranhas...based on the anger, i type a message to this idiot, "its almost 3am. what are u expecting me to do? do interview with Oprah? get a life, people trying to sleep here!! and im not ANN!!" click on the send button and struggle to sleep again...

he didnt reply which is good, because if he did, im gonna track him down and really feed him to the piranhas... so, my advice here, dont call or text people 3 o'clock in the morning and ask them what they are doing.. its plain stupid and im 95% sure its not gonna end up in a good way...

August

things i hate...

let me think, there are few things in this world that i hate, maybe i'll say things i like less, sounds more appropriate... i cant really list down all of them, here's some of it... when i say some, i really mean some... LOL!!

+ late for appointment
+ late for work
+ messy hand writing
+ dirty plates, mugs, spoons, etc in the hand wash basin
+ people who dont listen when i talk
+ untidy paperwork
+ traffic congested
+ blood sucking creatures, bed bugs
+ hot weather
+ no ice cube in the freezer
+ disrespectful
+ repeated mistakes despite doing the same thing so many times
+ not knocking on the door when obviously there's a door
+ stupid answer for easy/simple question
+ lame excuses
+ noise when im on the phone
+ veges
+ stupid jokes
+ medicines
+ blackout, im afraid of dark
+ not answering calls
+ misunderstand
+ betrayer
+ slow internet connection
+ plain white milk, powder milk

hmmm, these are just the main things i can remember for now... i will list down things i like/love soon... LOL!! this is fun, i dont even realize there are so many things i hate in life... LOL!! roger and out!!

August

Get Up, Dress Up & Show Up...

im back to work today, after a long Raya break... hmmm, wish to lay back on the bed for a little longer this morning, but have to drag myself up, take the shower and head to the office... not much car on the road, the traffic flow is great and im singing along with the rock tune on my radio while driving. i remember one of the quote on that paper my boss pasted on our pantry's wall, No Matter How You Feel, Get Up, Dress Up and Show Up...

uggghhhh, well F*ck Up!! i dont really fancy an email from the HR department asking me why i didnt show up and requesting me to fill up the leave form and state a reason why i was on MIA... well, i never did that before in any company i have work with... if i dont feel like working, i'll just text the office saying im on emergency. or else, i'll start rubbing my eyes or stuck my head in the freezer for 5minutes and i'll get the temporary flu symptom that any doctor in the world will definitely grant me a medical leave... hey, nothing is wrong right? i am sick at the time i see the doctor, even though its temporary, right? LOL!!

ya ya, bla bla... its not a good thing to do, but when u dont feel like working, your presence in the office will just be meaningless and tiring. u dont really work, all u do is just pretending to be working by staring at the laptop and clicking on the mouse for 8 freaking hours... i cant even sit still for 15minutes, how do you expect me to stare on the laptop for 8hours?

on top of all this, here i am, in my office, writing and sipping on my coffee, my dictionary and client's file are wide open, i do look like im damn busy... LOL!! hey boss, i did get up, dress up and show up today... happy now?? LOL!!

August

Selamat Hari Raya...

its Raya time... yay!! not super excited about it plus feel a bit awkward eating during the day time after 30days of fasting... i woke up around 7am this morning, have my coffee and help my mother in the kitchen... after the Raya prayer, i know people will start coming to my house. we did prepared lots of extra food for the guests... ordered hundreds of satay from the famous Satay Haji Samuri... yummy!!

i dont have a kampung, Kuala Lumpur is my kampung... when most of the KL clan were busy planning their trip back to their hometown, i was busy planning with my brothers and sisters where to go for the Raya holiday. normally we just go to Genting or just hang out somewhere chit chatting and talking craps and laugh at those stupid jokes we made... this year we dont have any plan, im back at my parents place, we will just go and visit our relatives and spend the day with play station and computer gaming... tomorrow we are going to have a BBQ, ordered the marinated lamb and chiken from Giant hypermarket in Batu Caves... i dont realy like lamb, chicken is more to my liking. LOL!!

anyway, it feels good to be home... Selamat Hari Raya!!

August

breakfast in Kampung Baru...

few days left for this Ramadhan to end... im going to wait till the very last day to do my shopping. its gonna be simple. just one baju kurung for me since i already have 2 baju kedah which i made a month before Ramadhan started.. well, i already wore them to work actually... cant wait for 2 months to wear them. LOL!!

since im already back to my parents home, even not permanent, im more close with my youngest sister... so, i was thinking to get a new baju kurung and a new handbag for my step mother (i actually call her mother). i bought new shoes for both my parents... i know my dad was so happy when he got it, because he keep the shoes in the closet and i saw him smiling. but he just act stiff in front of me, well as long as i now he's happy im fine... no need any thank you, a smile is more than enough...

im going to pick up my two brothers and sister this evening... we're going to breakfast in one of the western restaurant in Kampung Baru. i've made the reservation and i cant wait to go there... the food is cheap yet taste good...

Aidilfitri this year is gonna be different... i hope its gonna be as great when i was younger. i hope everybody will celebrate it with a smile and i hope i can keep on smiling for the rest of my life because i know things will be good. not gonna be easy but i will make sure its gonna happen the way it suppose to be long time ago...

August

returning home...

well, to be honest, i live with a family that doesnt have any blood relation with me... not my brothers, not my sisters, those little kids, not really my nephews and nieces... i knew them since 2001. it all started when i was doing my industrial training during my 3rd semester in local tech college further north... since then, i keep on coming back to them and this is a place that i call home...

the lady that i've been calling IBU (which mean mother) wasnt really my mother and was just 5 years older than me. when i first met her, she was holding a baby carrier with a 3months old baby girl sleeping so blissful in it... now that little girl already turn 9 and she have another 3siblings... IBU and her husband run an electrical engineering company and there is where i do my training and also the place i got my first job...

IBU and the entire family member, from grandma, to aunts and uncles, to relatives far away in Kelantan and her siblings treated me so nice and wonderful... they make me feel like i belong to the family. been almost 10years and i can say that i am so grateful for having them in my life...

to be honest... i dont really have a good relationship with my own father. when my mother passed away, i was just 9 years old. being a second wife, my mother doesnt really mix around with the neighbors to avoid them from asking so many questions. when she died, i was kinda lost... my dad brought the first wife to stay in our house together with her 4 kids... i have 6 siblings. 10 children in one tiny house with 2 rooms, i force myself to learn how to share and not to be so demanding... my step mother doesnt really favor me since i look exactly like my mother only that im much taller...

i go to school everyday pretending like nothing happen... hardly change my school uniform. i learn how to clean, to cook and to babysit as early as 10 years old. during school holidays, i help my aunts to look after my younger cousins, and she will brought me to the mall and bought me new school uniforms, shoes, stationery for me to use. but i normally share the new pencils, eraser and all the stuff i got with my younger brothers and sisters...

life wasnt easy for me... but im glad i manage to make it through. got into so much troubles but i never avoid them, i tried as best as i can to deal with it... been away from my own home for almost 6years, that's how long i havent seen my father and my step mother... i did saw my brothers and sisters few times in a year. i heard from one of my brother, my father wasnt really well, heart problem... i just nodded and didnt say anything...

its about time for me to go back to where i come from, to a place i belong... it might make everybody feel so awkward for my sudden return but this Syawal, im going to celebrate it with my parents and siblings. let my father scold me, yell and hit me if he wish to, but im returning home... im returning home...

August

blogging is a trend...

blog isn't new to me... it started becoming a trend since many years ago. i have been blogging since the past few years. but this is the first time im using blogspot... i was on blogdrive before and had brought some of my posts there to this new blog... i dont have much time to bring all the entries, so i just took the latest 4 months writing i've made and paste them here...

i made few friends through blogging... hang out and had few gatherings... but, as the time pass, we get busy with our life, work, classes for those who's still studying, the friendship seems to be forgotten. some of them went overseas and some just dissapear. not to mention, some just dont catch my interest to keep them for a long time in my friends list.

owh i still remember we even had Blogging Idol, but obviously i wasnt even qualified to participate in the competition... LOL!!

above all, i really miss writing... i decided to write again. not for audience, not to grab readers attention to my direction, just want to write...  what the heck, im writing and will keep on doing so until i get sick of it... LOL!!

August